Word to your Momma

Oh my.  What a ride this has been.  It has finally occurred to me that Gianna's recent behavior (these last few days specifically) may be a reaction to her loss of control as we've implemented 1-2-3 Magic as our discipline/training method.  For four days she has tried everything in her power to push me over the edge.  (Trust me when I tell you I got pretty dern close!)  Her latest manipulation tactic includes the use of her new favorite word. 

She's been using it for 'sport' the last couple of months....but now she is using as a weapon (the word, that is) --- particularly against me. 

"Hi Poo-Poo Mommy!"  is how it all started.  It was playful and funny (although I didn't laugh) I just asked her not to call me that.  And than I tried all sorts of reactions to curb the behavior.  (Ridiculous, I know.)  The ignoring of the behavior came WAY to late in the game. 

It has now become a retaliation to my efforts in calling her on her poor behavior.  If I count (part of the disciple routine), if I say her name (in that momma tone), or even if I raise my eyebrows at somethings she's doing --- the response is "Poo-Poo". 

Let's say she whines after I've told her not to do something.  I'll say, "That's one."  She looks me right in my eyes and says, "Poo Poo." I then say, "That's two."  Her repsonse, "Poo-Poo"  "That's three. Take some time out." And as I escort her to her room, she might either say "I'm sorry mommy" or "Poo Poo" another 5 times.

That delightful repartee was repeated at least 25 times yesterday in some form or fashion. 

EXHAUSTING!!!!!!

Oh, and on Sunday at Mass - she slid herself down off the kneeler and was starting to lie down on the floor.  I tapped her on the shoulder and (with a smile) shook my head. My angelic little cherub summoned the courage to stand herself up and say (louder than a stage whisper)

"YOU'RE POO-POO, MOMMY!" 

Lovely.  She was escorted out of the pew to the back of the church where we had a special little "Come to Jesus" meeting. 

During these spiritual meetings I've been doing my best TV evangest impersonations with her forcing strongly encouraging her to repeat the prayers that I make up on the spot. They usually go something like, "Dear Jesus,(repeat) please help me become a better listener (repeat) and help me to obey my mommy and daddy. (repeat)"

I think yesterday afternoon she was sensing that I was at the end of my rope and that her behavior was not only making me miserable, but her too!  After she was released from prison one of her time out sessions, I heard her say these words, "Dear Jesus, help me be better listener and not say poo-poo ANY MORE!" 

I was almost encouraged by that sweet prayer until she committed another offense not even ten minutes later. Geez.

But this morning, my friends, it appears the tides have turned. She has been PURE DELIGHT all day long.  For every time she said poo-poo yesterday, she has said, "I love you, Mommy." today.  Music to my ears!  I wanted to hurry up and post this before she wakes up from her nap...because I want to claim this lovely turn of events as progress - and, well, we all know how toddlers are --- can't really always count on their good behavior.  I'm cautiously optimistic and am determined to claim this as a mini-miracle.

This is a video I took during lunch today.  There a tiny little example of her testing the waters. :) 

(Oh, and SGW - I'm dedicated the "naming" part to you and Ben.)

Fingers crossed for the afternoon!!

It's time for a little MAGIC

Cute kid, right?

Yeah well - it's a darn good thing - because sometimes her behavior is SOOO challenging.

Overall - she's a precious, joyful and delightful kid....but the Jekyll and Hyde complex is definitely alive and well in that adorable little toddler shell.

Iain and I had gotten to the point where we were truly losing our minds.  He kept saying that he thought she needed to be on medication.  He asked me what I thought was wrong with her. 

She's two, she's smart, she's willful, she's secure and she's fearless. That combination has the potential for creating The Perfect Storm in toddler world. And our busy munchkin has definitely taken Lewis Land by storm.  I'd say a Category 5 storm. 

We were at our wit's end (probably all 3 of us) when I came across the name of a book several times within a week.  I thought it was a sign, so I did a little research and when I saw the title of the fourth chapter, I knew I needed the book.

The name of the book is 1-2-3 Magic (for Christian Parents).  And chapter four was named "The Two Biggest Discipline Mistakes.  Wanna know what they are?  Here ya go....

1. Talking too much.

2. Showing too much emotion.

Guilty. BIG TIME GUILTY!  Actually - I may be one of the top offenders in both categories.  So, I immediately ordered the book.  It took us a couple of weeks to get to it because of several things that we couldn't control - but my Jury Duty stint afforded me the time and interruption-free environment to really soak it up. That was my silver lining (not to mention getting a break from all the daily toddler drama I had been experiencing.)

Part of the reason the book is named 1-2-3 Magic is because many parents claim that once they put the principles into action, they start to see results immediately -- like magic.  I love the version of the book that I got (for Christian parents) because it connects all of the discipline guidelines to biblical principles - and it just makes so much sense.

Surprisingly, just as soon as we started implementing what we learned, we started seeing a welcomed change.  It has considerably reduced the stress level in our home.  We're still learning.  We need to go back and read some parts again. I'm just so happy to have this reference to help us raise our child the way we want to - and at the same time enable us to enjoy her...the way we're supposed to.

Now, I must say that using this method doesn't eradicate the bad/obnoxious behavior we'd like to get under control.  Some days (like today!), she's just as challenging as before we read the book.  The big difference has been how we are reacting to it.  And actually - I think THAT'S what's reducing the stress in our home.

I'm no expert in parenting or discipline. That was clear today as I spend about 70% of the day counting, and escorting Gianna to time out. But after two different conversations with friends this week, I have realized that maybe I should share this recommendation via my blog.  Maybe someone else is out there at there could benefit from this little book.  It's an easy read, by the way, and it's meant for use with children between ages 2 and 12.  That's a pretty impressive range.

If you already use the method, I'd be so interested to hear from those who already use the method and are having success - and how you handle some of the pitfuls that you encounter.

So if you're interested in getting a small taste of the book, just click here to take a look at the first few pages...

Postscript:  I should mention that within 30 minutes of her waking up this morning, Gianna has pulled all of her tricks out of her latest bag - and I reacted farely well for about 25 of those minutes.  Then, I blew it.  I'll probably screw up a handful more times throughout the day.  Magic? No.  Helpful. Yes.

Parking

Thank heavens for the change of weather!

Back to parking.

Jumpoline

Sometimes it's a trampoline, sometimes it's a jumpline.  It just depends on her mood.

But she's ALWAYS in the mood to jump. 

Oh my - how this girl LOVES to jump.

Thank heavens for this beautiful spring-time weather, lately.

Movin' on up...

Just as we came out of the other side of the January sleep stand-off - the brilliant mommy decided to graduate G from a toddler bed to a twin.  I was going to wait til we moved, but I wanted to sell the toddler bed in our next garage sale. (Thrifty usually trumps reasonable.)  We had the twin bed anyway....it was my childhood bed.

I'm happy to report that a few weeks into our new transition, there were no bumps in the road and she is happy as a clam to be in her BIG big girl bed.