Saturday, November 09, 2013

Jelly Book - Volume 12 (Atumn 2013)

I've been keeping a Jelly Book since Gianna was a baby.  It's just a compilation of fun things gianna says and does that I want to remember.  Here's our autumn edition.  Our other's can be found HERE.
 
(The 1st one is from last school year I forgot to record....)
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
In Pre-K, Gianna came home proclaiming....
G:  Hey, Mommy, I'm the dudy today.
Me:  What?
G: I'm the dudy at school today.
Me: Did somebody call you that?
G:  Yeah - Ms. Lisa said I was the dudy.
Me: What does that mean?
G: It means when Ms. Lisa leaves the room, I get to take names of who was talking and not following the rules.
Me:  OHHH - you were ON duty.
G:  Yeah - that's what I said.
 
And apparently, when she was ON duty - she would get up, walk around, correct children who talked and gave back scratches to kids who followed the rules. Apparently someone is liking this little power trip.
 
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
We were cheering on my alma mater at football game and midway through the game Gianna noticed the players on the sidelines take their helmets off and kneel down.  She wanted to know what was going on.  I told her a player had gotten hurt and the other players were being respectful.

G:  Did he get the wind knocked out of him?
Me:  I'm not sure what happened.
G: (Folding her arms and shaking her head)  I sure hope it wasn't alcohol.
Me:  Why would you think that?  How do you know about alcohol?
G: Ms. Pam (teacher) told us all about it.  It can really mess you up.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
We were passing by the tv and Dancing with the Stars was on.  Figuring Gianna would like the dancing, I beckoned her to stop and watch.  She watched for about three seconds until she GASPED. 
G:  Well, THAT'S not very modest!!!!  Why is she showing so much skin and why doesn't that man have a shirt on!!!
 
Well, shame on me and good for her!  Glad some of these lessons are sinking in.
 
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
At an Italian restaurant, Gianna got uncharacteristically quiet.

G: "Do you hear that?"
Me: What?
G:  It's alien music!
Me:  (laughing) Well, actually - it's not alien music- it's opera.
G:  That's OPRAH?

 hahahaha
 
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

We recently had a terrible lice outbreak at a local private school which had everyone scurrying to jump on the prevention bandwagon.  After hearing stories of frustrated moms at ballet, I made a bee-line to CVS pharmacy to see what preventative products I could find. 

Satisfied with my choice, I placed my items on the counter at check-out.  Gianna quickly informed the clerk,  "These are for the children at OLQH school because they have bugs in their hair."

Me: (horrified, I quickly covering her mouth) Little Miss, these are for YOU!
G:  Hey! I don't have bugs in my hair.
Me: And we're trying to keep it that way. Besides, We don't mention those things to other people.
Clerk:  Girl - you're not telling any secrets.  I sold 60 Lice Treatment kits today.  I know all the scoop.
G:  (smile)
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

After my shower I called Gianna in the bathroom to fix her hair.  She spotted my pile of discarded clothes on the floor and said,

"DANG!  Are those your boobie holders?  They're huge!"

Thank you. I'm well aware.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Looking at her own chest in the mirror she asked, "When are my 'nibbles' going to turn in to breastes?

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
While driving home from school one day, Gianna asked,
"Can I have ass-n when we get home?"
Me:  What?
G:  Can I have ass-n when we get home?"
Me: I heard you, I just have NO idea what that is?
G:  (frustrated) ASS - N!!!!
Me: I'm sorry - I still have no clue, Gianna.
G:  You gave me it this weekend...
Me;  What?
G:  When I was sick you kept making me drink it?
Me:  Ass-n?
G: Yes. You told me if I drank too much it would hurt my tummy.
Me:  You mean orange juice?
G:  Yeah - you said there's ass-n in it.
Me:  Gianna - it's called ACID.  Why didn't you just ask for orange juice?
G:  (shrug)
Me:  (sigh)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
When Gianna wants to race, she begins by saying, "On your market...get set....GO!"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
We were in the grocery and Gianna said,
"Can I have Starbucks?"
(Two ladies whipped their heads around shocked at this request from a little munchkin.)
I was just as shocked....I rarely have Starbucks and don't ever bring her.
Me:  What do you mean?
G:  Those little square candies I got for Halloween....Starbucks.
Me:  Those are called Starbursts.
G:  Oh.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
G: Hey Mommy, is it Happy Hour?
Me:  Umm....actually it is.
G:  Can you take me?
Me:  We'll see - but can you please say the word Sonic when you ask me to bring you to Happy Hour?  People are questioning my parenting.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Me:  Gianna, what do you want for breakfast today?
G:  Panera Bread (We recently got a new restaurant in town - but she'd never been there.)
Me:  What? 
G:  Panera Bread - you know - that special kind you bought me?
Me:  That's Pepperidge Farms Pumpkin swirl.
G: Yeah - that.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
While telling the above two stories to Gianna's friend's mom, she told me a cute story about her daughter.

Camille:  Mommy, Grandpa brought us to TWO restaurants today for lunch.
Mom:  Uh-oh - he shouldn't have done that.  Where did he bring you guys?
Camille:  Old McDonald's and Tinkerbell.

Mom said she got McDonald's quickly but it took her 10 minutes to figure out the second place.  Turns out, it was Taco Bell.  Hahaha. 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
We went to a bowling party and Gianna was horrified to get a whiff of cigarette smoke once we entered the building.  The have a secluded little room with slot machines and I'm sure that's where it was coming from.  Gianna gives lectures on the subject of the dangers of smoking so she marched her little self up to the counter to complain that people should NOT be smoking in the building where other people were.  They lady got the biggest kick out of that and made her repeat her spiel to several other workers and patrons.
 
A few months later we went back to bowl with a friend and upon entering their was a huge standing NO SMOKING sign. Gianna was thrilled. 
"They listened to me.  They listened to my rules! This is great.  Now we don't smell cigarette smoke when we walk in.....just stinky bowling shoes!!"
 
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Gianna's school did a fundraiser selling poinsettias.  Her sales pitch was really good.  While enjoying her recent Halloween tea party, Gianna delivered her pitch to Ms. Brenda:

G:  "Hi, my name is Gianna and we're selling poinsettias to raise money for our school.  They're beautiful, big red plants and they're only $10 each. How many would YOU like to buy?"
Brenda:  Well, I think I might like five.
G:  (sigh) Well, pretty much everyone is just getting two.
Brenda:  hahahahahahaha

Need to expound upon our sales training, I guess.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Overhearing a phone conversation I was having with my mother, Gianna surmised that we were invited somewhere.  She quickly interrupted saying, "Yes. Yes. We'll go. Where does MeMaw want us to go?  Tell her YES!"
Me:  Gianna - it's a picnic and it's really cold out and you're  just getting over being sick, I'm not sure it's the best idea.
G:  Oh please. Oh please. Oh PLEASE Mommy can we go?
Me: Gianna I'm just not sure yet.
G:  Mommy. I'll give you $40 if you say yes.
Me:  Really?  You've got a deal.  Pay up.
G: Umm.....

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
 Gianna is getting pretty good at singing the Star Spangled Banner.  Her name for it?
"Jose', can you see..." 
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
One morning Gianna was holding the American flag and looking intently at it.
Me:  What are you doing?
G:  I just can't stop looking at the blue.
Me:  Why's that?
G:  Because the blue stands for courage.
Me:  :)
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
One Saturday morning, Gianna and I were having a sad, lonely time of it - so I put Gianna in the car and did something out of the ordinary -- went to the Nail Salon to get pedicures.  (I swore I wouldn't do that when she was little. Oh well - no regrets.) 
Anyway, Gianna got a kick out of the experience and struck up a conversation with the nail tech.
G:  Are you Chinese?
Nail Tech:  No, no, no! I not Chinese - I Vietnamese. Look - You can see my eyes. They BIG.  You cannot see Chinese eyes cause they just have slits.
G:  (A little confused)  Oh.
NT:  Ness time - you not ask if someone Chinese.  You ask if they Asian. Okay?
G:  Okay.

Later on when someone asked who painted her nails.  She said, "Some lady who wasn't Chinese.  She was 'Casian.'"  (Guess that's and Asian/Cajun blend.)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
While saying night prayers, I asked Gianna if there was anyone special she wanted to pray for.  She answered, "...the poor, banished children of Eve."  (Comes from the Hail Holy Queen prayer.) Before I could respond she said, "...And, why were the poor children banished anyway?"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Gianna got a phone call from a friend of ours who was recently engaged.  He asked her to be their flower girl for their wedding next summer.
Gianna was ecstatic and very sweet in her response. 

When she got off the phone, she looked at me and said, "I'm so excited, but this is SO 'nervousing' for me!"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
While playing with her friend, Matthew, Gianna sweetly asked,
G:  Matthew, will you marry me?
Matthew:  (without missing a beat) Not unless it's in front of a preacher.  That's what my Dad says, anyway.

3 comments:

  1. Thank you for the laughs. Where are you living? My mom moved back to Sulpur.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Living in Lake Charles, Georgia. You'll have to let me know when you come visit. Anthony and Gianna would have fun together.

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