Monday Morning pick-me-up

We're on Day 17 of Gianna's EXHAUSTING sleep strike.  It's been so stressful, that I can't even blog about it right now.  But as I came across an amazing blog called Mila's Daydreams, I was charmed by the creative pictures of this beautiful sleeping baby.  Ahhhh......a SLEEPING baby!!!!  While the baby sleeps, the mom collects items from around the house to create enchanting scenes and then photographs them.  The concept is especially inspiring.....maybe I need to show these picturs to my own daughter in hopes of inspiring her (to sleep, that is.)

Just so sweet.

All I keep thinking is.....this mom must have a housekeeper if she's spending all those precious nap times setting up pictures.

"NO" - a 'yes' in disguise!

No.  It's a tiny little word yielding a tremendous amount of power.  It can be frustrating to hear and frightening to say.  It can be an ending or a beginning.  It is mostly perceived as negative, but can be the gateway to many positive things.

I know you are thinking that this post will be about my two year old's use of the word, but it's not.  It's really not even about the word -- just the meaning behind it.

Let's rewind many years to session of spiritual direction.  I was working in ministry.  I was stretched thinner than I had ever been and was seriously suffering from the 'Need to Please Disease."  All the things I was involved in at the time were wonderful ways of giving to others....but I was miserable.  I just couldn't figure out a fix.  I felt obligated, required and called to 'do good' (and probably to 'look good' by 'doing good.')

Well, my spiritual director questioned my need to say 'yes' to most everything that was asked of me.  I was a little confused, because I really believed I was doing the right thing and that I was making God very proud.   "No." seemed so harsh and negative and shameful to me.  I will never forget her words to me...

"Ah, Maria.  It is "no's" that give much more meaning and power to each of your "yeses." 

Even though I've come such a long way since that dismal time in my life, I continually have to be reminded about that truthful nugget of wisdom - especially now that I must be a model for my daughter.

Lately, I've had to use my no's quite a lot. I expected to be filled with guilt and maybe even a touch of shame. I've been surprised to have found quite the opposite. I am filled with relief and peace.


One example was a recent choice to participate in a women's study circle - one of the few things I've done for myself lately.  It got so stressful and frustrating with my husband's increased work schedule, other unexpected issues coming up and figuring out how to parent my challenging two year old.  I backed out. "No."  I had to give myself permission to quit something I'd started. I looked at all the busy moms of many kids who were able to keep that commitment - and sighed.  Then I took a deep breath and got over myself and then found peace.  There will be time for that in another chapter of my life.

Another 'no' was to a ministry - serving on the Board of Director's of the Pro-Life Agency largely responsible for our adoption.  It started out a do-able commitment, which snowballed into a consuming effort.  There was major guilt involved in this one.  ("But you're helping to save babies!" someone told me. Ugh.)  I mulled over this one for a while, prayed about it and finally realized that there was one baby that I was given TREMENDOUS responsibility for....MINE!  I chose to stay home so I can be here when she needed me, when she was sick, when she was going through rough stages, so I can enjoy every bit of her.  It became clear to me that my 'no' was a YES in disguise.  It was near impossible to feel guilty about saying yes to my family. 

As we meander our way through this season of Advent, we remember another woman who's 'no' gave meaning to her ultimate YES. The 'no' was to her own will....her own plans.....her own dreams that she had for her life.  That YES became our Savior.

My prayer is that we can all still ourselves enough to know what we are called to say no and yes to.  Happy Advent.

One Minute Sermon

You've probably already seen this creative message...but just in case you haven't, here it is:

Sweetest Blessings

There's no mistaking it....

...she's certainly the sweetest blessing we've ever received. I took the above picture this morning after church.  She had a quiet moment after lunch and I had a heart-melt.

A Different Kind of Blessing

It's a joy to teach Gianna new things, new words, new songs ~ but it is my greatest joy to teach her about Jesus and help her to discover her faith. Oh, don't get me wrong, we're not having pre-school theology classes, but we have started in very small ways...with the blessings before meals and night-time prayers. She's watched us pray from the beginning, but has begun participated the last few months. These prayers are my FAVORITE time of day - everyday!
Here's why:

The Invisible Woman

Overscheduled days.

Mundane tasks.

Unappreciated acts.
Invisible women.

Our busy lives are full of these. 

I hope you can take a quick five minutes out of your busy life to listen
to some inspiring words from someone who's experienced the insibility as well as enlightenment.

I've read this before, but seeing it is even more powerful.

She has a book too.
Here's the written excerpt shared in the video.

Perspective on Motherhood: The Invisible Woman. By Nicole Johnson

It started to happen gradually …

One day I was walking my son Jake to school. I was holding his hand and we were about to cross the street when the crossing guard said to him, "Who is that with you, young fella?"
"Nobody," he shrugged.
Nobody? The crossing guard and I laughed. My son is only 5, but as we crossed the street I thought, "Oh my goodness, nobody?"
I would walk into a room and no one would notice. I would say something to my family - like "Turn the TV down, please" - and nothing would happen. Nobody would get up, or even make a move for the remote. I would stand there for a minute, and then I would say again, a little louder, "Would someone turn the TV down?" Nothing.
Just the other night my husband and I were out at a party. We'd been there for about three hours and I was ready to leave. I noticed he was talking to a friend from work. So I walked over, and when there was a break in the conversation, I whispered, "I'm ready to go when you are." He just kept right on talking.
That's when I started to put all the pieces together. I don't think he can see me. I don't think anyone can see me.
I'm invisible.
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, "Can't you see I'm on the phone?" Obviously not. No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.
I'm invisible.
Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?
Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, "What time is it?" I'm a satellite guide to answer, "What number is the Disney Channel?" I'm a car to order, "Right around 5:30, please."
I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again.
She's going … she's going … she's gone!
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of-style dress; it was the only thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a banana clip and I was afraid I could actually smell peanut butter in it. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, "I brought you this."
It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: "To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees."
In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:
•No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.
•These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.
•They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
•The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, "Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it."
And the workman replied, "Because God sees."
I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become."
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.
I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.
When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table." That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, "You're gonna love it there."
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

2010 Handbook

My sweet friend emailed this to me today and I thought it was blog-worthy.

Health:

   1.     Drink plenty of water.

   2.     Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.

   3.     Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants..

   4.     Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy.

   5.     Make time to pray.

   6.     Play more games.

   7.     Read more books than you did in 2009.

   8.     Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.

   9.     Sleep for 7 hours.

   10.    Take a 10-30 minute walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

   11.    Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

   12.    Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

   13.    Don't overdo. Keep your limits...

   14.    Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

   15.    Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.

   16.    Dream more while you are awake.

   17.    Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

   18.    Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with His/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.

   19.    Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.

   20.    Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

   21.    No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

   22.    Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away

             like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

   23.    Smile and laugh more.

   24.    You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

   25.    Call your family often.

   26.    Each day give something good to others.

   27.    Forgive everyone for everything.

   28.    Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of  6

   29.    Try to make at least three people smile each day.

   30.    What other people think of you is none of your business.

   31.    Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

   32.    Do the right thing!

   33.    Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

   34.    GOD heals everything.

   35.    However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

   36.    No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

   37.    The best is yet to come.

   38.    When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.

   39.    Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

A Brand New Year

  "What eye has not seen, and ear has not heard, and what has not entered the human heart, what God has prepared for those who love him,"
1 Corinthians 2:9

Looking ahead, I cannot even begin to imagine what 2010 has in store for us.  I enter this new year with hope, renewed faith, gratitude and commitment to do and to be better.

I'm intend to learn from past pitfalls.

I love this little little "autobiography" that I read years ago, but was reminded of today. 

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters
by Portia Nelson

Chapter I

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost... I am hopeless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter II

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in this same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter III

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it there.
I still fall in... it's a habit... but,
my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter IV

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter V

I walk down another street.

"One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: To rise above the little things." 

~John Burroughs

Blessings to you and yours this brand new year.